were bound in a bag, out of which the hair was desperate to escape. Upon closer inspection, she seemed to be speaking to her hair in harsh hissing noises. Then, in a moment, I realized whom I was sitting next to—a real-life celebrity. I quickly spoke to the Gorgon. “I love your hair,” I whispered. “They look great tonight!” Medusa turned and smiled. “Thank you! I always feel like they’re a burden. I have to take them everywhere. Brings a new meaning to ‘let’s go back to my place and get stoned,’ which is currently my best pickup line.” She laughed heartily. I reminded myself to chat with her after the night. A new city meant I needed a new group of girlfriends. “Claudia,” I introduced myself. “Medusa.” She smiled back. “We should get some coffee sometime.” “I’d love that!” The bell rang, and Frank stood up. “Thanks for listening,” he whimpered. As he sat down with Medusa, I heard him utter a dejected “Fire!” What came across my table next was the biggest surprise of the night. After seeing reanimated men, werewolves, and even a Swamp Thing, I couldn’t comprehend what was sitting in front of me. “Hi, I’m Paul.” A young man about twenty-昀椀ve sat in front of me. He wore a white and blue plaid button-up with a clashing tie. There seemed to be nothing different about him, but he smelled great. “Hi Paul. I’m Claudia. Are you wearing some aftershave? You smell great!” I really wanted to know that scent. “Nope, just regular ol’ Eau de Paul.” He seemed con昀椀dent. “So, are you a shapeshifter?” I needed to know more. “Nope, just a good ol’ fashioned human. Moved here about six months ago. Picked up a remote job, so I said, ‘Aw heck, let’s see the world.’ And let me tell you, what a world it is!” I could not focus while he spoke, but while I sniffed out what was wrong, I let him continue. “But why Transylvania?” “Oh, I love the gothic architecture, and the people are just so darn nice here. As long as I don’t go out at night, or during full moons, or if there is an angry mob—” I 昀椀guratively smacked myself on the forehead. Duh, I’m PLAINS PARADOX ■ 64