• Challenge your expectations. Some people are perfectionists, constantly striving for excellence. A lifestyle of compulsive perfectionism can become physically and emotionally damaging to a person coping with lupus. Adaptation to new challenges can be encouraging and fulfilling. A new challenge to consider, if you have a tendency to perfectionism, is to perfect the art of adjusting your goals. Be flexible in adjusting your expectations and you may be rewarded with a more positive attitude and increased activity. Keep the outcome secondary and enjoy the process of learning and developing yourself. • Boost your self-esteem. Maintenance of a strong sense of self-worth is vital to keeping yourself healthy. The better you feel about yourself, the more you’ll care about supporting a healthy lifestyle. All the previous suggestions for learning to express and manage emotions and controlling negative thoughts will help you feel more confident in your abilities and improve your self-esteem. Follow these simple guidelines if you have days when you need a bit of support and inspiration: People who live well with lupus and successfully cope with its challenges share certain characteristics. They have insight and understanding into their personal strengths and weaknesses and have realistic expectations of themselves. They can define their personal goals and find gratification in their accomplishments. Living well with lupus requires a strong sense of self-worth and a feeling of control over their life events. People who live well with lupus believe they can influence their world and shape the course of their illness in their life. • Structure your day with small goals you can meet. • Talk to a friend. You know who is willing to take the time to listen. • Spend time with other people. It helps to feel connected and less alone. • Help someone. Your life does make a difference to other people. • Treat yourself to something you enjoy. You are special and you deserve a gift from yourself. • List the reasons you are liked. People enjoy being with you and it helps to remind yourself of that. • List the things you do well. Then do one of them. Preventative coping strategies for physical health Lupus is a lifelong, incurable disease that may require lifestyle changes and adjust- ments. The challenge facing many of those living with lupus is that the disease can affect many aspects of daily life, such as physical functioning, the ability to work outside the home and earn an income, and socializing with friends and family. People living with lupus often need to adapt to complicated medical regimens to control symptoms and prevent disease flares. Making gradual and achievable lifestyle adjustments can help improve quality of life and provide a sense of well being. Each person with lupus experiences different signs and symptoms so a personalized learning plan is needed. To help yourself live well with lupus, it’s important to learn physical measures and develop preventative coping strategies. Some of these ap- proaches may be useful in your situation and others may not be practical. Start with something you think might be enjoyable and something you will be able to accomplish. This will give you confidence to try other methods and will make it easier to add to your own personal plan. 67